A long day with a long night
Long Night In Egypt review
Production company – Violet Hour Media
Rating – 
I must admit that this one has passed me by originally. I was looking through the GreatPods site and when I saw this podcast I was immediately intrigued. It had an awful lot of things that seemed almost tailor made for this here podcast geek. Horror? Check. Ancient Egypt? Check. Good sound design? Check. Good reviews? Check. Of course, this show jumped to the top of my listening list and I spent last Monday (18th March) on a bit of a binge.
So intrepid reader, let us head to Cairo and explore the ancient tombs, and I’ll tell you exactly what I think of Long Night In Egypt.
So what’s it about?
Long Night In Egypt is an 8 part horror fiction podcast. It follows a group of American Egyptology students travelling to Cairo to study the pyramid of Unas, near Saqqara.
The first episode sets the scene and we meet the main characters. They are all the usual horror tropes that we have seen before. There is the bookish nerd who is excited for the trip, the couple with the domineering girlfriend who’s only there to keep an eye on her partner. Also, there is Mo, the guy with local knowledge whose idea it was to go on the trip. His uncle is an Egyptologist, with access to the pyramid, so that is the lead into the story. Actually, the jock/metalhead antisocial asshole is missing. But apart from that, they are all there.
After meeting up with Mo‘s family they head out to a nightclub. After a few drinks Mo‘s young cousin Samira decides it would be a good idea to steal the keys to the tomb and head out there after dark. You know, as all teens in horror stories do. Samira’s brother Amir, is against the idea (there’s always one), but gets roped in to be the driver for the night.
From there you can guess what happens.
Is it any good?
Unfortunately, no. After reading the original review I thought I was in for a treat. More on that shortly though. Let’s start with the good news shall we?
The sound design is excellent. Particularly in later episodes, you can almost believe you are there. The sound effects and music remind me of my favourite old Egypt themed games, and I really liked the sound of the flaming torches being waved around too.
Also, they obviously did a ton of research into the subject matter. I do wonder though, why they used a picture of the Great Pyramid for the artwork, when one of the older ones would have been better, or you know, even the real pyramid of Unas. But then that is possibly the most pedantic thing I’ve written in a review.
Then of course there is the macguffin. In this case, an old book containing maps of the pyramids and tombs in the area. Concerning the book, 22:20 seconds into episode one was my first major eye roll moment. Yes, I really did note the time, and that sentence was the first thing I wrote for the review before anything else. When you get there, I guarntee you’ll mouth the next line just before the character says it.
By the time I’d got to episode 6, I no longer cared what happened to any of the characters. The script was clichéd, and the acting was not great for the most part. Particularly as the events started to ramp up, their reactions got more subdued. There are situations that take place that would surely drive people literally insane, but no. These plucky students just brush it off, and not only that, they brush it off with such nonchalance. I’m sure there could be an argument that there is some magical reason for this, but it really shook me out of the story.
Not even the legendary Karim Kronfli seemingly playing most of the supporting cast could rescue this unfortunately. By now you’ll know my esteem for him, and like David Ault, his appearance in a show is usually a seal of quality.
As I said in the first paragraph of this section, I had read a review that sparked my curiosity. It waxed lyrical about the acting, the research, and the general creepiness of the show. Maybe I’m missing something, but this is the reason I dont read other people’s reviews. I dont even listen to trailers of podcasts.
Final thoughts
Sometimes I’ll find a show that turns out to be really not that good. When you listen to podcasts all day, that’s the nature of the beast, and you do get used to it. What really gets me is when there’s a show that to all intents and purposes should be perfect but isn’t. I always feel a bit cheated. This is one of those unfortunately.
You may be firmly on the side of the existing reviews (now two 5 star ratings on greatpods). You might love the show. Or, you may have higher standards that you hold horror shows up to. When I see lots of reviews all saying thr same thing, I really do wonder whether it’s just me being a contrarian. I have the courage of my convictions though, and I ignore the nagging voice of doubt in my head in much the same was as I ignore my son when he’s nagging for V-Bucks or COD points.
One good thing to come out of this though, was that I discovered the brilliant London After Midnight audio adaptation. I’ll be reviewing it very soon indeed. Next week in fact.
You can get Long Night In Egypt here:
For more great podcast reviews I recommend GreatPods